Australia

Sucking milk through Tim Tams,

our collective chocolatey grins.

Big Ted on playschool,

cattle dogs “doing” the heard.

Sun and nicknames,

hot dry summers,

lawn hose runners,

sand that burns your feet at the beach,

all the kids screech.

Pineapple on burgers.

Zinc on your noses.

Our laid back life style that is oddly competitive too,

taking the piss out of ourselves, me and you.

Not being too stuffy

calling our bosses buddy.

Saying, “Sweet.”

“Moving on.”

“It's happened now, what can you do?”

“Can't change it, even if I wanted to.”

Tall poppy syndrome...

don't we just love knocking people off their thrones.

And we all say crap,

and “fuck,” just to fill some space,

“'ken oath," or “'ken hell",

as we make bongs from garden hoses,

watching never ending fucking Sport:

test cricket,

Aussie Rules,

Rugby League,

if you can understand it at all.

Flies and beer,

thongs and singlets,

those silly Acubra's with the corks dangling down,

not something for going to town.

AC/DC,

sunscreen across your nose.

Y's on the end of good people’s names;

Farnsy,

Barnsy,

Warney, and the rest.

Timmo,

Chook,

and Bluey's the best.

Good humour,

cultural cringe,

beer guts with tank tops,

thongs worn with jeans and jumpers on a cold winter’s days.

Barracking for the underdog in the outer bay.

Public holidays, thumbs up, never enough,

Long weekends full of BBQs,

good friends,

drinking beer.

Unintelligible slang,

shorts and t-shirts,

Winnie Blues up your sleeve,

laughing easily.

Gum trees.

Plum trees.

Sheep and cows.

The Dreamtime.

A roast lunch on a Sunday.

Swimming in the Murray river,

cockatoos, rosellas, king parrots,

“Ya bloody galah!”

Eucalypts,

kangaroos,

spiders and snakes,

Weis Bars,

bindis,

panel vans,

for fuck's sake.

Hot Christmas Barbies.

Bagging out the Kiwis.

The Royal Show,

drover’s dogs,

we love the wogs.

Pavlova’s,

lamington drives.

Kanga Cricket,

Koalas that aren’t bears,

Oi Oi Oi!

Vegemite toast,

suburban 1/4 acre blocks.

Having a whine

how Public Transport is never on time,

or that fucktard’s a swine.

Inner city trendies,

blokes called Wendy.

Storytellers,

Ruth Park, Norman Lindsay, May Gibbs,

Tim Winton, Kate Grenville, Peter Carey.

Bullshitters,

fucken fairies,

Aunty Gwen.

The Dreamtime.

Gum Trees in Europe that make us all miss home.

Bionic ears,

cervical cancer vaccines,

heart transplants,

blackboxes,

the Victa mower, I still have Pop's original in the shed.

The Hills Hoist's that give mum a few minutes of peace.

And everything good that ever came out of New Zealand at any given time.

Fresh Air

No rhymes today,

I did other things, okay.

I walked in the sun,

Felt fresh air like a hug.

My mind serene,

warm light on my skin,

vitamin D for my soul,

the lightness of a stroll.

Social media, online news,

normalising abuse,

madness trying to take hold,

shake it off, be bold.

Jagger

Jagger took 1960's society in his hands,

he took his chance,

saying, Coming with me and dance,

and he never let go,

and we were never the same.

It Is Hard To Care

Do I really care?

It is hard, I declare?

The uninformed have got a voice,

swept up in political power,

demonising the disenfranchised,

worshiping fear,

bringing out the worst in people,

and the worst is winning.

:( 

Come on planet,

snap and take the selfish down,

take the deniers, take us all,

We have lost the right to rule.

Ten seconds to midnight,

five seconds to midnight.

Human beings are too stupid

to live,

shitting all over their own world.

Space

Space,

we all say we want it,

not many of us get it,

not enough time for it,

most of us wouldn't like it

even if we had it,

it is just something to say.

Smile for the Camera

Smile for the camera

with your best blouse on.

Switch to your camera face,

no matter what is going down.

Don’t think of your uncles fingers,

or yesterdays sad dinners,

that you are not a winner,

your lost puppy,

or that you are grumpy.

Look happy

stand straight

don't frown

never pull a face

you look like a clown.

Three, two, one,

everybody smile.

Don’t squint in the sun,

try not to freeze,

say cheese.

This is forever,

you know,

this split second

on show.

Blocked

Let's have a crack

with this and that,

a cat on a mat

how about that?

Does that take you back,

when you first had a crack?

Sitting on mats

in a circular group,

at a table with pencils,

the sun always shining.

The cat was black,

the story was a hack

and that mat,

did I mention the hat?

There we sat, empty vessels

waiting to, wanting to, learn.

Innocents etched on our faces as we sing,

that's MY crayon, so much to take in.

 

Dry

The poetry magic seems to have dried up for a time,

I will certainly let you know once it comes back online

If

If I had wings...

The Truth About Karma

I don't believe in Karma

there are too many successful cunts

in the world for that to be true,

but what can you do?

Be nice to your mum, she’s your number one fan,

She’s the one who’ll always tell you you can.

Be nice to your enemies and your doubters too,

as they don’t care how many ulcers you self inflict,

if you hurt yourself, if your wings get clipped

what path you tread, if you succeed or trip.

Stop for the ducks crossing the street with her chicks,

give to the poor, be nice to the sick,

think of the world with kindness ,

give a smile, forgive those who act with blindness,

help little old ladies, admire the brave.

Let the Golden Rule dictate how you behave.

 

Kindness is the Meaning of Life

I hope life treats you kind

and you have all you dreamed of,

you are never short of friends

and you feel love

from beginning to end.

Do everything with kindness

and the sun will shine

over you forever.

Be kind to those you meet

and be kind to yourself.

And be kind to the world

it will treat you better that way.

They’d Sell Their Grandmothers

They'd sell their grandmothers

Down the river for money,

And then deny it

Three times,

If that’s what it takes,

Even with CCTV footage

They'd say no,

Even when the old lady

Cried out in pain

And asked why,

Eye to eye,

They'd say it wasn't true

As they sliced her in two

The simple truth of the human being,

All but a few

Good men and true

 

You Must Like Beer

No fats

No fems

No Asians

No queers

No Muslims

No terrorists

And no niggers

Or anyone from over “there”

We’re saving our way of life

(sunshine and a fair go?)

Visitors are welcome

But not multiculturalism, (irony, no)

And you must like beer

Cricket and footy

Get a nickname, get a 4WD

Plan for your kids it's your duty

I wanna see me

When I look at you

And I don’t want to smell anything but

Chicken fillets and stew

 

Distracted (extended)

White noise

And all that chatter

It is good for the soul

But with writing it matters

Be silent, be still,

I mean you no ill-will

I think and I think

I can forget in a blink.

I sink

It stinks

My eyes tell my mood

And I won’t want to be rude

But fuck you!

If you continue to exude

I need quiet!

Shhh! Dude!

 

I'm Walking Through Water

I'm walking through water

to get to you

the whole world, it would seem

is pushing against my thighs

as I move towards you

not even knowing

what you will say

Spot The Dog Would Have Been Just As Great

Everybody says John Howard was a great prime minister

His come back was called Lazarus with a triple bi-pass

But he presided over such a period of boom

Lucked into times of plenty, like we’d never seen,

That I am sure you could have put up Spot the dog as PM

And Spot the dog would have been thought of as just as great.

State of the World

The world is going to hell

You think that is dramatic,

I can tell.

Well, let’s look at the evidence

Before us then

Where to begin?

Should I start

Before or after

Extinction?

Distracted

I can’t write

When Sam is around

Another fortnight

And I’ll get something down 

Shine

A poet must rhyme

sometime

get back to his day job

leave the mob

say something beautiful

words full

he might need some quiet

to be inspired

shut the world out

to get deep down

make the folks smile

maybe cry

fell alive

sometime,

and shine.

 

Trickle Down Economics

Told a lie

Privatised

Quantified

Ratified

Jobs denied